The Starting Place For Raising Children

Read this blog post by Troy Dorrell

I believe it is the goal and desire of every Christian parent to raise children who will love the Lord, the church, and mom and dad. Certainly this is no easy task and requires much prayer, grace, and deliberate effort.

In our desire to raise godly children we often study the Scriptures, look for principles, and seek the counsel of others who have gone before us. These things are all to be commended and encouraged; however, there is something else that mom and dad can do to help accomplish their goal of raising happy and well adjusted children.

It is something that is often overlooked in the search for principle and precept. That something else is for mom and dad to genuinely love each other. The starting place for a happy home and godly children is for mom to love dad…and for dad to love mom. 

When the relationship between parents is good and filled with love, so many things are accomplished in the hearts of their children; they feel safe, secure, and a sense of stability that cannot be accomplished in any other way. Our children desperately need to be taught right things and to be kept from evil, but they also need to see a loving and happy relationship between the people teaching them these things. 

When dad cherishes mom and mom is honoring dad, the things they say actually carry weight and credibility. When they can observe apology, forgiveness, sacrifice, and love in action, it is something they are much more likely to adopt for themselves. Preceding the great command of Ephesians 6:1 “Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right,” comes the instruction of Ephesians 5:25, “Husbands love your wives, even as Christ loved the church.”

I believe one of the greatest gifts that any dad can give to his son or daughter is to desperately love their mom. One of the greatest examples a mom can give to her son or daughter is to honor and respect their dad.

Troy Dorrell is the Senior Pastor of Eastland Baptist Church in Tulsa, Oklahoma.